Four years old with my back to the door. All I could hear was the family war. Your selfish hands always expecting more. Am I your child or just a charity ward? You have a hollowed out heart, But it’s heavy in your chest, I try so hard to fight it. But it’s hopeless. Hopeless. You’re hopeless Oh father, Please father. I’d love to leave you alone, But I can’t let you go. Oh father, Please father. Put the bottle down, For the love of a daughter. It’s been five years, Since we’ve spoken last. And you can’t take back what we never had. I can be manipulated only so many times, before even I love you starts to sound like a lie. Don’t you remember, I’m your baby girl. How could you push me out of your world? Lie to your flesh and your blood. Put your hands on the ones that you swore you loved. So young when the pain had begun. Now forever afraid of being alone. Oh father, Please father. I’d love to leave you alone, but I can’t let you go. Oh father, Please father. Put the bottle down. For the love of a daughter.
No matter how many guys come in and out of my life, you’re always gonna be the one I want the most. I compare each and every one of them to you, and no one measures up to how you’ve been able to make me feel. Distance sure does make the heart grow fonder, and it also can drive people fucking crazy. It’s just not fair. Two people who are absolutely PERFECT for each other but aren’t able to be together…It’s all just hard to take at times. Those other boys, well they might even make me smile, but the whole time I’m thinking of you. I put up all these walls just because it’s like you’re the only guy who could break them down, and I know it. I wanna open up and let others in, but that can’t be fair to them. I can’t devote myself to someone knowing you’re in the back of my mind the entire time. I need to find a cure to this lovesick world I’m spinning around. You’re perfect, we’re perfect together, but this situation…it’s not so perfect. Those memories, the ones that stick out like a sore thumb, literally captivate my mind. Before I close my eyes at night, that night on the beach races through my entire body. I want to relive it all. You’re so good for me and that’s what kills me. You bring out a side of me I never thought existed. You changed the way I look at life and you’re easily the ONLY person who’s ever made me feel a certain love struck happiness. These are the days I wish I didn’t wear my heart on my sleeve. Welcome to the world of a Hopeless Romantic.
I really hope you don’t end up disappointing me. I’ve been prone to never investing my full attention into anyone , other than a SELECT few. I just don’t want to get my hopes up and have everything turn up wrong. Please. Don’t. Fuck. This. Up. Thanks.